Funny: (and probably offesnive, you have been warned)
Some random IRC quotes from Bash.org
* Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs
* Procrastination is like masturbation; it's all good until you realize you just fucked yourself
* I'd rather smear my nuts in honey and then tea bag a red ant hill than watch the matrix reloaded again
* heroin should be more widespread. it's like an off button for morons
* That's when I brought up the fact that lesbians are looked upon as "fine", wheras gay men are always getting the complete beat out of them for no reason. She got pissed off at this comment, and snapped at me "What, are you a fag too or something?!"
* I'd really hate someone to have a website containing all the stupid things I'd said.
* i was watching Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon the other night ... and i was wondering where all the tigers and dragons are ... then i realised they're all crouching and hidden
* I beat the internet ... the end guy is hard
* death is the ++ at the end of life
* If anyone molests me while I'm gone, take some pictures for my website
* and yet I have NO spelling erros
* i wonder what my dog tries to say to me when he barks ... "stop touching me there"

Keep reading ... now, go do it.

... thanks Cholup!